Happy New Year! I hope 2012 brings you everything you hope for yourself.

For me, the New Year begins with the release of my new book! Friday, January 6^th! At last!  The title is “I Love You – Now Get Over Yourself: 7 Secrets for Professional Success from The Jewish Mother Executive Coach” (phew)!

For the last 3 years, working on writing this book, I changed topics several times trying to find the most useful thing to write about. I went through the agonies of self-doubt, crises of confidence, and just plain laziness. In the end, it was crystal clear that whatever I was to write had to be about and for others. It was one of the greatest challenges and most difficult tasks I’ve ever undertaken. However, I won’t lie, when I actually saw and held the physical copy of the book in my hand, it was thrilling. I had actually accomplished something I never thought I could.

Make no mistake though. “I Love You-Now Get Over Yourself” is about you. It is about the issues you deal with in your professional lives and how to handle them successfully. It details how others have faced the same issues and beat them and how you can do it too

My greatest hope for this book is that it will serve as a valuable tool for solving some of the problems you’re facing.  Just as in my coaching, it is direct, to the point, with dashes of humor.

There are client stories to illustrate each of the 7 problems and then, step by step coaching enabling you to successfully handle the situation.

The book will be available in soft-cover and e-versions for however you prefer to read.  Also, I will be putting chapters or parts of chapters on line here from time to time, perhaps with a different client story illustrating the issue.  So check back here to see if there’s something more I can give you.

I hope you buy the book, use it, and love it. But however you feel about it please let me know. I learn from every reaction, suggestion, and comment and I can help others by using your feedback.   If you are so inclined, please feel free to write a review on the amazon site.

Buy the book here!!!!

Once again, best wishes for a wonderful new year and I look forward to hearing from you in 2012.  ♦Ruth

Often, the people who call a coach are already successful. They call because they are likely facing a situation and they want to be sure they get it right.

The notion that somehow one is weak or inadequate is simply wrong. It isn’t because he feels inadequate that Roger Federer has a coach; or the best actors have coaches. It’s because they know they are the best and they are facing something they either haven’t dealt with before or that they want to perfect.

Let’s take a successful actor – if a male has to play a female, he needs to be coached on how to be, act, and think like a female. He needs a coach – maybe more than one. Or if a winning runner is about to race on terrain they haven’t tried before in a place they’ve never been, they need a coach to advise them as to the best strategies.

A successful CEO may be looking to change her direction. To help make a smart decision she will hire a coach to be her trusted advisor. Someone who will challenge her thinking, help strategize, devise new tactics, teach a new skill, and polish what is already there.

And here’s one that surprised even me – a successful surgeon! Coaching a Surgeon: What Makes Top Performers Better? How admirable! He does end the article with a bit of humor (dark humor maybe) – read the last line.

Executive coaching is for the courageous and the successful. It is not for those who are afraid, who think if they call a coach they are showing weakness to themselves and others. Employing a coach to advise and help you get to the next level, make the difficult decisions, or help ratchet up the ante for your next big thing, is smart and shows a level of individuality shared by the strong.

No matter how well trained people are, few can sustain their best performance on their own. That’s where coaching comes in. – Atul Gawande

Just because you’re right for the job, doesn’t mean you will get it. And sometimes, it has nothing to do with you at all! For some unknown reason, the hiring manager didn’t like you. Unfortunate as this may be, it is the reality. It happens often. Check out this article. It puts it all into perspective http://buswk.co/p3uC2q

When you are being interviewed here are a couple of questions you can ask to help leave an impression of someone who is thoughtful and interested. They by no means guarantee you the job, or even that they will like you, but it does set you apart from someone who is simply answering questions.

1. Ask whomever is interviewing you what they see as the biggest challenge facing the company/the department.
2. Ask what they believe the person needs to be successful in the position.

The only recourse you have is to put yourself out there, razzle-dazzle ‘em a little and then wait. We often know when we’ve hit it out of the park, or we just didn’t connect. Then again… maybe not so much. Whatever the outcome, think about it a little, then let it go and move on.

Good luck. If you have a hiring story, we’d love to read about it. ♦ Ruth

Like it or not, women do need coaching if they want to rise to senior leadership levels in mid to large organizations. The McKinsey report is quite clear about this – http://on.wsj.com/fldB8j .

Also necessary, is coaching to a new mind-set for the male-dominated leaders who are responsible for promoting women. According to the report, many organizations have consciously made efforts to promote women. That is true, however there still remains the bias that women are the “weaker sex” and therefore would not make good leaders. .

Strategic thinking, multi-tasking, conflict resolution, coaching and developing staff, as well as the many other parameters for promotion may be the same for men and women, but they need to be broadened to mine the depth of women’s business and personal acumen.

Certainly, coaching women to the C-Suite will help considerably. But the barriers- spoken and unspoken – will remain unless men are also coached about how to think about women inside their organization.

The report recommends that top managers be judged partly on their ability to groom and promote female talent. A strong reason for coaching the men.

That operational focus must be more than an organizational objective. It requires a commitment to the belief that it’s a positive thing to “groom and promote” women, not only for its own sake, but because it serves the organization well. As the report eloquently states: “A diversity program by itself, no matter how comprehensive, is no match for entrenched beliefs that prevail.” This is why women may need coaching to be promotable, and men need coaching to know how to promote them.